Hey, I tried ChatGPT!

Holy Cow!  I asked ChatGPT about quilting, or “how to quilt” and got a whole list of instructions, pretty detailed, actually.  That’s not what I expected, but I found it helpful.

Only problem, I couldn’t figure out how to save it!  Ugh.  Maybe use a different browser?

I discovered, though, that there are lots of things I need that I don’t have if I want to consider quilting, even using my trusty old sewing machine.  Rotary cutters, blades, cutting board, rulers….geez.  Batting.

And of course, I’d need a plan.  Ugh.  I have someone else’s hard work, and only want to put it together, somehow.  And yesterday, I got flustered, and forgot my own phone number!

Maybe, I’m too old to learn this.  But, what the heck.  I’ll toy with it, now and then.

Memories of Morning Workouts

Once upon a time…. we used to go to the races regularly.  Indeed, my beloved mom is on the track at Charles Town Races where she wanted her sweet loved horses to run over her every day!  They still do.  And Saratoga trips for the Travers Stakes were some of the most cherished trips we took, and had breakfast at the track, watching workouts with other visitors.  I did this painting and don’t have it anymore.  My daughter carried it off to Arizona along with my grandkids, leaving us old folks behind!  Ugh.  Miss them all, so much! 

Favorite Pics of Kids

I miss having the grandkids everyday so much.  Sometimes I just spend time looking at old pictures of them.  Of course, they’ve all grown by now, and even the youngest is 16, and far, far away.  Looking forward to a possible visit this spring, though, when school lets out either for spring break, or after the semester.  Here’s a few of my favorites.

This is one of my all time favorite pictures…..

 

My Sis Wanted to be a Tree! So She is!

Actually a lovely red maple, in a forest of green right back of her home of many, many years, where she and Mike walked the dogs so many times.  After a tearful memorial service on Saturday, we assembled a team, got all the necessary equipment, and did the deed.  It’s healthy, and even stood on it’s own when we removed the stick, to see if it would.  Of course, we put the stick back in anyway, for a while.  Piper was with us, and got very muddy and dirty out in the woods.  Evening rain made it an ideal day to plant.

Nan's tree, a healthy red maple.

Lost My Beautiful Sis!

It is with heavy heart…..isn’t that how so many such postings begin?  Well, heavier, still than even that.  My sis, a constant while I was growing up, was beautiful!  Also, a force of nature few ever tangled with successfully.  She was willful, and positive.  A role model many would thrive from, if followed.

As children, she was my protector, and seldom did bullies bother me after tangling with my beautiful sis!  I was her shadow and she took me with her almost everywhere, partly as a self-protection technique to easily spurn undesirable suitors!  Ha!  Yes, that was Nan.  Those undesired always tried to befriend me, with the purpose of pumping me for information about my beautiful sister.  I was onto that.

Her loving husband of 51 years and I pulled together a short obituary, and it’s posted here.  We hunted for good pictures of her, and remembered since she studied photography, it was usually her taking the pictures, so those we have are fewer than we thought.

When her health began to fail was first, I believe, a bout of cancer in the area of the throat, and radiation was the treatment of choice.  However, that left a constant problem with swallowing, and almost every time she ate, she would have to upchuck some of it.   A sorry state of affairs.  Top that off with Rheumatoid Arthritis, and many allergies to meds that might have been easier to take than those she was prescribed.  A cyst formed on her spine in an bad spot and no one would touch it.  Her pain was constant, and unrelenting.

Then a stroke.  Fortunately, it left no terrible after effects, and while recovering from that scare, along came COVID.  Of course, with her immune system already compromised, she and her husband both got it.  His antibody treatment was highly successful, and she wound up in hospital, gravely ill.

After that, she had a series of falls.  Once, went to ER unconscious for no apparent reason, which had obviously caused her fall.  Heart?  She did have AFIB and a pacemaker, and maybe that tied to all her many medications for other various ills caused that, but I don’t know.  Not being a doc.  But, then, the docs didn’t know either.  Her balance was all pretty much gone.  Then she had more falls, over and over.  God alone knows what caused most of it. They said congestive heart failure near the end.   But this all continued for over a two year period, and she fought it, and the constant bleeding from little punctures or scratches from the blood thinners.

Through all of this, her biggest concerns were always for her husband!  She never lost her care for others!  Big, big heart.  Fighting pain and weakness, she worried about others!  Suffered through our baby brothers death, and worked at getting his ashes interred properly, a task that took more than a year.  She cared.  Greatly.  For others.

That’s just a testament to her loving heart, and demonstrates her character.  She loved her husband, those who worked with her, loved her dog, loved me, and her other family.  We had plans to get her well enough to go back to the pool and build strength with water aerobics.  And now, that will never happen.

But, she’s got no more pain.  She’s at peace.  And God has her, along with our intrepid Mom, and brother, Larry.  And of us four, I’m the last.  And I miss her like crazy.  And  she  will  be  a tree  soon!

God’s Beauty Everywhere

Amazing, but first thing in the morning, when I fetch the paper and walk the dog, this black gum tree just is there, always, reminding me that each tree, each leaf, each human, each living entity is unique, individual, and not really a copy of anything or anyone else.

That tree, with just a bit of light behind it’s beautiful branches, each distinct, is a constant reminder of the wonder of God’s love, that all this and so much more is here for us to remind us of that love all the time.

Yet so many folks have no clue of the beauty all around them.  Maybe God created artists just to show people what they are missing!  Yet, God is the greater artist, having designed all this.  Thanks, God.  Thanks for your son, and thanks for all your creation that you so freely gave to us all, sinners or not!  It’s up to us to choose to see.

Stubborn Old Folks

My husband and I had lunch yesterday at one of our favorite lunch spots, Famous Dave’s.  They have fabulous barbecue, and we go every Friday for lunch, often picking up some lunch for my sis to drop off at her house.

He seemed to have trouble getting up, and I offered to help.  I swear he almost snarled at me.

“I don’t need help!”

Well, I rolled my eyes, and we went on our way slowly.

It’s not uncommon for elderly couples to help one another get out of a seat, or with groceries, or other tasks that come up.  But, I don’t know, we seem to be two of a kind.  Because today, after grocery shopping, he offered to help.  And, of course, I said, I’ll be fine, and continued to bring in the grocery bags.  They weren’t bad this week anyway.

Then I recalled that Friday lunch.  I know neither of us will ask for help, and don’t want help.

What we want is to be fully functional as we’ve always been.  Even though it’s becoming clear we aren’t so young anymore, or so independent.

Frankly, he’s always been a gift from God to me, because we fit, and he’s provided everything I’ve ever needed.  Including independence to do what I choose with my time, and lots of quiet, so I can blog, or read, or do research as I choose.  Always supported my art projects, and always supported our children.  And grandchildren, as well.  Allowed me to homeschool those grandkids, and we enjoyed that so much, took many trips, saw many things, explored and learned so much.

God is good.  And He sent me an angel.  One who insists he can do everything by himself, even though he’s bent over, can’t stand straight from failed back surgery, in chronic pain, and now has COPD.  He’s stubborn.

Like me.  We fit.  60 years we’ve fit.  I love the guy.

Been a While, but I had a Dream

Sometimes in dreams the strangest things happen.  And I’ve never attempted to interpret them, or try to figure out what they mean.  But this one?

My sis and her husband, both having grave medical conditions, have a car with a dead battery.  Now, that’s true.

And I talked her into taking it to NTB which stands for National Tire and Battery, to replace the battery.  Once I got it started, that is, with my handy dandy Halo starter switch.

When we got there, in the parking lot, there was her plane, a WWII wreck that could still pick up off the ground and fly briefly now and then.  I’ve no idea why it was in the NTB parking lot!  I just knew she loved the plane so much, even if it was a wreck.

We were told by the technician, that the battery would be $300, and that would fix the car, and keep it running.

But she wouldn’t do it.  Needed the $300 to fly a short distance, so spending it on a car battery was not an option.  Not in her book.

We discussed, argued, and reasoned the issue, and in any event, the car had to make it back home with a bum battery, so I’d have to use my Halo again to get it started just for that.  And then, it would be permanently dead.  Unless she relented and made a sensible decision.

Now, they were both in bad shape, physically, and in pain all the time.  Couldn’t even manage without a walker, and I couldn’t understand the stubbornness at all.  The car was obviously more important to their actual daily functioning.

But the plane was more important to them.

Eventually, in the argument, she said, “You don’t understand, do you?  The daily grind is just daily grind.  Merely surviving!  I’ve had enough of that for all eternity!  That plane represents FREEDOM!  That plane will lift me off the ground, and fly me around like a bird, and I NEED that plane!  It’s my hope, my dream, my possibility of escaping this daily grind, and GOING SOMEPLACE whether or not I ever come back! ”

And I saw it.  I saw the two of them climb aboard, and lift off!

What’s remarkable about the dream is I recall every moment of it when I awoke.  That’s rare.  And it scared me.  We seldom agree on anything, but I love my sis.

Holiday Season in Full Swing Here

And I’ve ordered all my gifts, mostly delivered to other around the country, and am still waiting on a few to wrap here, but really, it’s almost done.  Yesterday, we got our popcorn, and like some of the other gifts I’ve gotten, there was no clue who the sender was.  But, I do know.  It’s what my sweet next door neighbors always send us every year!  And the books, of course, I know came from my darling daughter and her family.  I was so lost in one of them, struggling because it is a big book, a history, Great Society, by Amity Shlaes, and it was compelling, well written, detailed, and heavy, with tiny, tiny print on large pages….but I struggled through 300 pages before a friend found a digital copy online, and surprised me with it.  So, I finished up in my old trusty faithful kindle.  I can usually read a regular book if it’s not too big, but arthritis in the hands, and neck make those big books difficult these days.

Such a good book, though.  History we should all know and understand.  Those were not evil guys, the ones who wanted to solve the problems of poverty, and most were avowed anti-communists.  But their programs were clearly not successful, however well meaning they were.  And the book explains gently why and how they failed.  Even included the fact that most were themselves disappointed and dismayed at the results.  This was the beginning though, of huge growth in government, and government power and programs, NGO’s sucking up taxpayer money and advocating while sounding official, and it’s frustrating today that this system has developed that leaves out the voter entirely.  Just sucks up his money and is spent on partisan crap.

Well, political opinions aside, we are about to again celebrate the birth of our savior, Jesus.  His teaching, His sacrifice, His giving all for us, is the reason for the season.  All the love and family gatherings, giving, and celebrating is to acknowledge a loving Father in Heaven, from whom all good things flow.  Trees, grass, pets, flowers, ice crystals in the grass in the dark, stars in the night sky, the moon, the sun, the universe, water!  All the wonders of nature that we see and largely ignore are gifts from that heavenly Father.  Oh, and our lives.  We are all his children.  And our children, and their children.

Thank you, Heavenly Father, for all your blessings, and your Son, whose sacrifice means so much.